Category Archives: Ever Changing Theology

God and grief

I heard the most outrageous thing. I heard someone say that a 3-month-old served his purpose on Earth and was taken back to Heaven.  The problem I have with that statement is that it makes God out to be kinda a dick. He lets the parents have their son, who fulfills his purpose in 3 months, then the kid is out of there. Sounds great for God and the son, but where does that leave the parents? Did they not love their son? Did they not have hopes and dreams for him when he grew up? Does God not care about the feelings of the parents, siblings, and other family members, just cause He knew better and it’s not His fault the parents loved their son? That is truly a dick move, no matter who’s doing it.

“But Andrew, God is always in control…” Continue reading

When times are hard…

I need to remember –

I draw my identity and my self worth from a God who loves me.

The God who loves me is good and never gives me anything bad.

The God who loves me and who is always good has good things plan for me.

The God who loves me and who is always good and has good things planned for me can take any situation and make the best situation.


I crawled in to God’s lap and somehow I was five again. In my adult life, I just recently suffered an emotional blow and I was struggling to find peace and to be restored to my right senses again. So I went to the place that I knew was loved and where I was safe, my Papa’s lap.

He held me and listened to me whine and complain about what was going on. After a few moment’s He calmed me and sat me up and turned me around. There was a table with toys on it. I pointed to one and said that I wanted this one, and this one is perfect and I want it and wanted it as soon as possible in the enthusiastic way that only a five year old can. He asked me if I was sure. I affirmed Him vocally and with an exaggerated head nod.  But, He said, stressing the point, I has a much, much better toy that this one. It’s so perfect and I picked it out, just for you. But you can’t have it today. When? I asked. He replied, you’re going to have to wait till tomorrow. Which toy would you rather have?

I stopped and thought about it. I could feel my little five year old brain processing this information, weighing the desire and apparent perfection of the amazing toy in front of me with the whole idea that a toy could be even better. How could it be possible? What would it be like?

I watched my little five year old self deal with these questions and I knew which one he should take, but he had to make the decision himself. I encouraged him to wait one day and get something better and my younger self decided that he would wait for the better toy.

Instantly peace came. The turmoil and the hurt were gone. I felt whole again.

Truth and Belief

I read a blog today from a husband of friend. It was about truth and belief. Here’s a link.

His post made me think. And I’m not writing this as a rebuttal or to pick a fight, it just made me think.

He made the point that truth is truth no matter what you believe. That I agree with. You can’t float away if you stop believing in gravity. And just because you believe in something doesn’t make it true. Believing in Santa Claus doesn’t mean that a fat man come down your chimney every Christmas.

With his post (Matthew, his name is Matthew) , Matthew started me thinking how belief and truth are actually quite related and how important belief is in affecting reality. (I’m departing his context and moving somewhere new).

Belief puts truth into action. It makes truth solid. It can’t change the truth, but it is how you interface with the truth.

Examples: The truth of gravity. If you don’t believe in gravity, you will be living your life in such a way that shows it. Say you’re an engineer and you have to design some sort of machinery. And in that machinery there are parts that need to move up and down. If you did not believe in gravity, you would not only build the machine to push the part up, but you’d have to build the machine to also pull the part back down. You can’t just leave the downward motion to gravity, cause well, it’s been flaky and unreliable. So because of your belief, you suffer (with extra works and costs).

Or take Santa Claus. Your belief in a benevolent entity that really just wants to bring you presents validates you to revel in the fact that something good is coming your way, and it enables you to treat your family well and put in the effort to be on your best behavior. Your belief benefits you and those around you. Your beliefs change your reality (being good = more presents, being bad = less presents) despite the lack of truth backing it.

So, then to bring this back home, how are your beliefs affecting your reality?

My back hurts. That’s my reality. A hardtail mountain bike on rocky trails don’t mesh well with my lower back. Now there are two parts to my reality equation: the truth and my belief.

The truth is I have a God who loves me, and not only can He heal my back, that He WANTS to heal my back.

So why didn’t I get prayer for it earlier tonight when I was with people who know the same truth?

I guess all I’m left with is this: I don’t believe it.

Sounds horrible, I know. I could break it down further and say that I do believe that God wants to heal, but it’s only a little pain and I can deal with it – but that opens me up to things like “I deserve to be hurting” and “God’s too big and important to care about me” which are whole other topics that need to be discussed.

Bottom line is this: belief defines which truths you create your reality from, and which ones you ignore.